Compliments On Your Kiss
by Krystal V
Summary: When Reno decides to have a try at karaoke... much randomness and weirdness. R


This is my first time making something like this. Honestly, I never imagined I would _ever_ do something like this! I just couldn't help myself! You know how sometimes you get inspired and you just _have _to write it? Yeah, well… Make sure you have the song playing while you read this. _Compliments On Your Kiss_ by _Red Dragon_, and let your imagination go wild!

Disclaimers: Everything belongs to their respective owners.

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Elena sat in her office, patiently waiting for the second the clock struck five. _Another five seconds_, her mind thought excitedly. Elena stood up and tidied her desk before walking over to the door when it suddenly slammed open. Elena took a step back from the suddenness and stared as it revealed Reno, standing in her doorway with all his glory.

"Lena! Guess what!" he shouted excitedly.

Elena cringed noticeably at the volume of his voice. "What?"

"It's happy hour!" Reno cheered.

Elena sighed and slapped her forehead. _Does this always have to happen? _Reno wasted no time in grabbing her arm and dragging her over to the bar several floors down.

"Reno, I really don't feel like it today!" Elena shouted at him.

"Aw, come on babe! Don't be such a party pooper!" Reno told her.

Elena pouted angrily. She never liked people calling her that because she _did_ like to have fun and party. But then, partying practically everyday at the bar and getting smashed wasn't exactly her idea of having fun. Elena sighed and just allowed Reno to drag her along with Rude walking calmly behind them. Tseng had just been exiting his office as they came round the corner.

"Rude, you take care of him!" Reno said.

Rude nodded and stood in front of Tseng's way to the elevator. Tseng raised an eyebrow at him then a glance to Reno who was still dragging Elena down the hall.

"What are you doing, Rude?" Tseng asked with a small glare.

"…"

Reno came over with a slightly hapless Elena and pressed the down button on the elevator. The doors opened and everyone went in. Tseng pressed the floor number he was supposedly going off at when Reno starting jabbing practically the whole 70 floors' numbers. Tseng stared at him and finally got what Reno was trying to do. If he didn't come to the bar with them, then we would have to suffer stopping at each floor to get to where he wanted. And there were probably _thirty_ more floors to where he wanted to go.

So when Reno, dragging a hapless Elena, and Rude stepped out, Tseng stepped out as well. Reno looked at him and grinned most evilly. Tseng moaned inwardly at that look. It never meant anything good. Meanwhile, the elevator continued to stop at every floor it was going to. A couple of days later, the Turks found that everyone in the building had called it the Haunted Elevator. Reno didn't care. He just laughed, very loudly too.

So, Reno dragged Elena, who still continued to look hapless, over to the bar and ordered about five rounds of beer. Rude sat next to Reno. Tseng sighed and sat next to Elena, who suddenly perked up and grinned at him.

"Hey, boss! I didn't notice you came!" she grinned.

"Just imagine I'm not here…" Tseng said.

"Oh, OK!" she shrugged.

Tseng glanced over to Reno and Rude who were conversing in hushed whispers amongst themselves. He raised an eyebrow at that. Then in sudden horror and realization, he figured that they were probably planning on bombing half of Shinra HQ again like they _attempted_ to the other day. (The left half of Shinra belongs to Heidegger, Palmer, Scarlet and Hojo. It was Rufus' clever little idea to put them on the other side of the building, far away from him.)

But then Reno and Rude, who was looking slightly uneasy, got up. Tseng and Elena stared at them, trying to figure out what they were trying to do as they walked up to the karaoke box. Reno looked through all the old records and stopped on one. He looked up and grinned at Rude as he turned the song on. Everyone in the bar turned their heads to look at them. No body had sung on that karaoke box in a very, very, _very_ long time. It was amazing to see it still working. Reno sniggered into the mike as the song went on.

Rude sighed and sang in a very unenthusiastic voice.

"_Compliments to all nice and decent girls  
Coming from the DJ Red Dragon  
You are my number one girl in the world, just like that"_

Reno elbowed Rude in the side at his lack of enthusiasm. Elena burst out into hysterical laughter. Tseng stared with wide eyes. And the whole bar gaped at them. Then it was Reno's turn:

"_Compliments girl on your kiss  
You're number one girl on my list  
And every time I think of you, I wish_

I wish that you could be my girl  
I wanna take you round the world  
Every time I think of you I wish"

Elena stopped laughing and stared at Reno. She never knew he could sing so… smoothly. Her heart skipped a bit and she began to blush. She pressed her palms onto her cheeks in an effort to hide the redness creeping along it. Tseng raised an eyebrow. Everyone's jaws had dropped probably five feet to the ground. Reno looked up at Rude and grinned.

"_Oh, your sexy body, oi, that a mad me  
Your good looks, girl a that a drive me crazy  
The way you nice, the way you sweet when you a walk 'pon the street  
Everytime me seh me se you gal me heart skip a beat  
Your good face, woman me know you're well blessed  
Drop your body woman that a way you possess,  
The way you move, the way you groove, and the way your lips pout  
Everytime me seh me kiss ya gal, you get me in the mood"_

Reno patted Rude's back as he sang according to tune.

"_Compliments girl on your kiss  
You're number one girl on my list  
And everytime I think of you, I wish_

I wish that you could be my girl  
I wanna take you round the world  
Everytime I think of you I wish"

Reno caught Elena's eye and wagged his eyebrows at her. Elena swooned into Tseng's arms who looked at her in confusion. Rude sighed and began singing his own verse.

"_Oh, compliments girl for you kiss  
the number one girl, Lord, on my look good list  
On top of the line you should be mine  
The rest of the girls dem left behind  
Woman me look how you body design  
You're a romance girl, won't you give me a chance  
FI natural woman me say I would a response  
And if you'd like to be my girl  
I would a take you round the world  
Buy you lot of diamonds, buy you lot of pearls"_

"Did Reno and Rude have too much to drink?" Tseng asked.

"No, they didn't drink at all," Elena replied.

Tseng looked down at her and blinked, "You're not unconscious."

"Uh… yeah, I'm not…"

"Why are lying on me then?" Tseng asked.

Elena immediately sat up and began apologizing to Tseng. Tseng regretted even saying anything.

"_Compliments girl on your kiss  
You're number one girl on my list  
And everytime I think of you, I wish_

I wish that you could be my girl  
I wanna take you round the world  
Everytime I think of you I wish"

Elena immediately turned her attention back to Reno… and sighed dreamily. Tseng shook his head, dismissing Elena as one of those cases of female behavior. Rude sang his last verse, relieved that it was the last.

"_Oh, your sexy body, oi, that a mad me  
Your good looks, girl a that a drive me crazy  
The way you nice, the way you sweet when you a walk 'pon the street  
Everytime me seh me se you gal me heart skip a beat  
Your good face, woman me know you're well blessed  
Drop your body woman that a way you possess,  
The way you move, the way you groove, and the way your lips pout  
Everytime me seh me kiss ya gal, you get me in the mood"_

"Reno! Rude! I LOVE YOU!" a couple of girls screamed.

Reno picked up a rose from a nearby table's centerpiece and threw it to the ladies. He laughed when they fought over it.

"_Compliments girl on your kiss  
You're number one girl on my list  
And everytime I think of you, I wish_

I wish that you could be my girl  
I wanna take you round the world  
Everytime I think of you I wish"

The song faded and everyone cheered. Rude had managed to sneak down the stage and back to his seat where he immediately began chugging down his beer. Reno was still on stage, bowing and happily receiving catcalls.

"Reno… you're insane," Rude told him once he had _finally_ came back. "I'm never doing that again."

"Aw, come on! It was fun, you gotta admit that!" Reno said then he caught a look of Elena.

"Elena? Are you okay, Lena?" Reno waved a hand in front of her face.

She just continued staring at him dreamily.

"Reno, whatever possessed you to do that?" Tseng asked.

"I was listenin to Red Dragon a lot the other day," Reno shrugged. "Then I started singing in the bath... on the way to work… then I found a record of it on the old karaoke machine there…"

"RENO!" Elena pounced on him.

Seeing this, the other girls pounced on him too.

"I got his pants!" Elena shouted, appearing out of the tangle only to get shoved back inside.

"Hey, hey, hey! Lena, give that back!" Reno shouted. "Oh, my god, I'm being raped!"

"Cheers, Rude?" Tseng lifted his glass of beer.

"Cheers, boss," Rude clinked his glass with Tseng's.

And they drank happily amongst the screams of help from Reno.

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I must have been _seriously_ high when I wrote this... anyway… reviews? Come on, I _had_ gotten a laugh out of you, right? A little chuckle? A smirk? Fine then!


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